You ARE becoming your mother!!

There was a time when I knew everything that there was to know... that, of course, was when I was in the 8th grade. Because of my vast knowledge, I found irritation in things here and there, that my mom and dad did "incorrectly",  in their day to day lives. For some reason, I was especially annoyed by something that my parents did all the time. They repeatedly watched the news and weather in a short amount of time. There wasn't 24/7 cable news at that point, no weather channel, but it seemed to me that everyday, they would watch the 5pm local news, 5:30 national news, and THEN the 6pm local news AGAIN. I mean really, did anything change in the last 30 minutes? Did a hurricane develop and threaten the Texas coast in the last half hour? I should think not. They didn't even bother to change the channel, it was the same exact footage! Seriously. And while we are discussing ridiculous parent behavior, why did they want you to make your bed each day? I always thought to myself, why would you make a bed that you are just going to mess up again in a few hours?...it made no sense to me. Funny thing happened along the way to adulthood...I became remarkably like my parents. Most people say at one point or another, I am NEVER going to do this or that like my parents...but they do, it is almost inevitable. I have been known to watch the weather channel for hours at a time, when no major weather is going on in my neck of the woods, or any other, for that matter. I am, by definition, a news junkie. My "default" channel is a cable news source. I read numerous online news carriers several times a day and have apps that notify me of major breaking news delivered via text message to my cell phone. There are many times when I repeat the 5,5:30,6 pattern that my parents modeled, and on the same station I might add, only I also throw in the 4 o'clock edition as well. I also, without thinking, make my bed each morning. Those are two silly examples, but they are simply to make a point. I have learned that the older I get, the less I know. Life is funny that way. I have also learned with age, that there aren't very many ways that I can come up with, that I wouldn't want to be EXACTLY like my parents. With each passing year, I pray that I become even more like them, than I am right now. So, to all readers with children who seem to know it all...if they appear not to appreciate you now, don't worry, they will...just as soon as they realize that, thankfully, they have become you.

I blame the stooges.

I think it's funny when people trip, stumble, fall or the like. I know I shouldn't, but I do. I don't think it's funny if the elderly fall or if someone is hurt badly, but other than that, pretty much everyone is fair game. I can't seem to help it, if I catch a glimpse of someone out of control on their way down, I am going to laugh. I try to show great restraint and make sure that they are okay first, but then, I literally LOL. Now to be fair, there is absolutely nothing funnier than when I eat it. Almost a year ago, I took quite a tumble down some stairs. I mean there was talk that I might require surgery, I couldn't walk without pain for about three months..it was serious. But before it was serious, it was hilarious. I was carrying something large down some stairs outside my home. Plain and simple, I missed a step and careened down nearly two flights, before resting with my legs up in the air and unable to move. For a second I thought it might be bad, then, I was unable to stop laughing...wishing so very much that someone had gotten to witness the whole thing.  I mean I would have paid to see video of the event...I probably would have watched it over and over again. Why? Because I thinking falling is funny. Other people do too, even if they won't admit it. Funniest Home Videos has been on for a long time...because people falling makes you laugh. I am not a frequent faller, but when I do, I do it up right. A couple of months ago, I was walking into Target with a friend. Inexplicably, I just fell down off of my four inch wedges. I could not stop laughing. People walking in at the same time probably assumed that I was drunk. Nope, just lost control over something I have had lots of practice doing...walking. Most people who know me fairly well, know that if they end up on the ground, I will have a field day. It's okay, I warn them, they are expecting it. But where did this come from? It's not very nice. I blame the stooges. All three of them. I watched the Three Stooges every morning before I went to school as a child. With each slap, push, fall and injury, I laughed harder. It was a ritual...The Three Stooges and my favorite breakfast as a kid...wait for it...two slices of peanut butter toast and a piping hot glass of jello. Yep, you read that right, hot jello. Strawberry to be exact. Tasted a bit like hot wassel and I loved it. This Friday a new Three Stooges movie is coming out on the big screen. We have already made plans to see it on opening night. I would imagine that it will be utterly ridiculous, at least that's what I am hoping it will be. I may have to sneak in some peanut butter toast and hot jello to complete the trifecta, they definitely don't offer that at the concession stand. So now that you have read this and if you didn't already know, you are fair game. Walk gingerly in my presence. And for goodness sake, if I can't manage to walk successfully when I am near you...point and guffaw. I will probably beat you to it.

He likes it, hey Mikey!!

We are all a little set in our ways to some extent, wouldn't you agree? Mother or father knows best, unless we are the kid, then we are sure we do. It happens in so many ways for me...I'm positive that I am right about things that concern me. I experienced a prime example driving to work this morning. At the first traffic light that I come to each morning, I have two choices. I can go straight, or I can turn left. I go straight because close to a decade ago, I decided that it was by far the BEST way to get to my destination. If I arrive at the light and it is red to go straight and green to turn left...I sit at the light and wait. It's worth the wait, because it is by far the smartest route to take. I know this because I informed myself of that fact years ago, and I know best. Over the weekend I was reading a devotional and it was talking about His ways vs. our own. And that came to mind this morning as I approached that first traffic light. It was red to go straight, but that green left arrow seemed to last forever as I got closer and closer. Now I'm not proclaiming God wanted me to turn left, but I do think He used that situation to make me think a little. For the first time in many years, I abandoned MY path and took another. You can probably guess the outcome. There was much less traffic, fewer lights and I arrived at school faster than I normally do. All because I was willing to try something new. Just like Mikey in the classic Life cereal commercial. His older brothers coaxing Mikey to test out the "healthy" breakfast in a bowl, unwilling to try something new themselves. Of course, much to their amazement, they exclaimed..."he likes it, hey Mikey!!". Several other things popped into my head once I had seen the merit in leaving behind what I thought was best for me on the road this morning. All the relationships that had been so important to me that had ended...in those times, feeling devastated by those conclusions, only to realize that something better had replaced those relationships and knowing God and His ways are better than mine. It seems that I'm a slow learner in that area and He must shake me occasionally to get my attention. I have learned that sometimes the greatest disappointments and hurt, lead to the most amazing joy. It's funny that all that came from a little green arrow on a normal Monday morning.

I was going to blog about procrastination on Tuesday, but I'm just getting to it today.

My postal carrier hates me. That's a pretty strong word. Okay, my mailman loathes me. We have already discussed some of my lazy tendencies, but this topic is better described as procrastination. For all intensive purposes, I check my mail about three to four times a year. It's really not me being lazy, the mailbox is just steps away. For the most part, I just really don't see the point. I know basically what's inside that box, and with a few exceptions, I don't really want the contents. It's junk. I pay my bills online, so no worries there. Let's face it, people really don't write letters too often these days, opting more often for texting or email. And of course, the overwhelming majority of what's in my mail is, junk. Now, I will admit that I may have missed a party/shower etc, if I wasn't alerted to watch for the invitation...and that's not a good thing, but about every four months I make the short trek to retrieve the massive amounts of nothingness. I have opened it up expecting the usual avalanche of paper, only to find a curt note from my mail carrier, explaining that my mail has been confiscated and must be picked up at the post office. That was January, it's still there. Like I said, he isn't fond of me. I don't blame him. There are times when I know I'm not someone's cup of tea and I always analyze the reasons they might have. I must admit that at times, I just go ahead and assume that they must have some sort of problem...I'm so easy to love! Right?! Ah, the tales we tell ourselves. With my postman, I feel no obsession to figure out why he doesn't like me. I know the reason and don't feel the need to change. I will be one of those people with a woulda, shoulda, coulda story. I'll receive a time sensitive offer of millions, or the like. I'll read it three months too late and then...it'll be yet another life lesson learned. That'll show me. I was thinking about going down right now to pick up my mail, but it will still be there waiting for me tomorrow. Why do today, what you can put off until tomorrow...or next month?

Name That Tune.

I had such a great Spring Break. I got to do so many fun things, see so many awesome people and I got to sleep. I love to sleep. There have been times in my life when I have experienced terrible insomnia. It isn't fun. In the last several years, I've had no problem at all sleeping, I just can't seem to get enough. On those occasions, such as Spring Break, when I'm free to sleep to my hearts content, I'm a happy girl. However, the vast majority of my days, I must be awakened by artificial means. My OCD emerges when setting my alarm. I check, recheck, and then check again. I'm not prone to oversleeping, I usually wake up a time or two just before my alarm goes off, just to verify that I have not, in fact, overslept. I have found that when I get off my usual school day sleep schedule, I must take drastic measures to get back on track. After time off, it is easier for me to stay up all night, than to sleep for a couple of hours and then try to get up. I use this method two or three times a year, and it ALWAYS works...until this morning. I'm aware that there is always a chance that I might drift off during an all nighter, so I set an alarm just in case. One would be silly not to do so. I'm silly, but I set it anyway. So, alarm set for 4:45am. I was sitting straight up on the couch, when my 21 pound four legged son jumped up on my lap, yelling like there was a fire. I looked at a clock, there are lots to choose from, and it read 5:36. What?!? I grabbed my alarm clock sitting in front of me, thinking that I must have been hitting snooze for almost an hour, but no. I had turned the alarm completely off and gone back to sleep, with no recollection whatsoever. Yikes. I really wish I had a video of the hour that followed..it would be entertaining to say the least. It is amazing what can be accomplished in a short amount of time, when it's absolutely necessary. In the rush that ensued, I was a little surprised that my morning song was playing. I am not making this up, for the last several years, whenever I first open my eyes in the morning, there is a song playing in my head. It's a different one each day, but I have had some repeats. They aren't usually popular songs, or ones I've have heard lately either. The tunes come from all genres and varying decades. Some of the songs I love, others, I don't really care for. I have heard Christmas carols in May and The Beach Boys in February. The song always replays in my head until I hear another one, which is usually on my way to school. Sometimes I sing along, sometimes I ignore it...just depends on the song. I don't think they start as dreams, but who knows. I don't even have time to think, "I wonder what's going to play today?", because it already is. I really like it, I feel like its pretty unusual, so it's fun for me. So like I said, in my rush from oversleeping, I wasn't sure it would be playing, but it was. Today's selection? White Wedding by Billy Idol. Go figure.

My laziness is about to pay off, big TIME.

I'll admit my faults, and I have many. One of them is occasional laziness. I wouldn't say that I'm any lazier than the average person, but I do seem to choose pretty random areas in which I display that unfortunate characteristic. Now to be fair, I have some admirable qualities as well, some are quite the opposite of lazy. I spend at least two hours a day riding my stationary bike. I don't watch tv unless I'm pedaling. That's not lazy. I vacuum everyday...steam clean my carpet once a week. That's my OCD showing, but definitely not lazy behavior. I go to the grocery store every other day because I want my food to be fresh. That is hard for me, I loathe grocery shopping. So, that is a big display of effort in my book. But... Back in November we had to "fall back". Remember? We were all excited about getting an extra hour of sleep? I recall that Sunday. I reset my microwave clock. I reset my alarm clock. I reset the watch I wear 95% of the time. Good for me. I failed, however, to change 21 wall clocks in my apartment. Yes, you read that correctly...21. I like clocks, I think they are interesting, so I've chosen to make them part of my decor...art if you will. There is not one place in my space, where you are unable to see a clock. So, that's where this story takes a turn. I didn't reset one of those clocks in November. I considered doing it during Christmas break, but it didn't happen. The thought occurred to me sometime at the beginning of February, but I decided that in only about a month, I would just have to change them all back again. So what would be the point? Now, we have come to the weekend in which we must "spring forward". As I write this on my bike, I must admit I feel rather accomplished. I have all my clocks ready to go ahead of schedule. Maybe it isn't laziness after all. Maybe I'm just making good use of my time.

Making lists is on my list.

As I was driving to school this morning, I found that I was happier simply thinking about the fact that the sun was up and shining. It's a lot harder for me to get going when it's still pitch black on the way to work. That made me think, it really doesn't require much to make me smile...just like the saying goes, it's the little things that make the difference. Things, hmm. What are my favorites?  If I was a singer, I might break out in song and start up with Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens, bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens...but that really would not be a good idea. If I were Oprah I would state my faves then shout loudly..."Everybody gets a car!! You get a car, you get a car, you get a car!!" all the while pointing to each of you reading this, but alas, I am no Oprah.  I'm just me and these are a few of my favorite "little things" in life. They are certainly in no particular order and I will leave out some of my very favorites, just because I am quickly rattling them off the top of my head....
1. finding the perfect verse in my Bible or devotional book that I was meant to read at that very moment.
2 .thinking that I am out of deodorant, then noticing that I bought the twin pack and there is a brand new one sitting in the cabinet.
3.a text from one of my girls to say hi or telling me something going on with them.
4. quoting from my favorite movies and tv shows.
5. a great hair day.
6. getting my first little blue box.
7. waking up at night and hearing it storming, knowing I have at least a few more hours before I have to get up.
8. being told I smell good.
9. a man who ALWAYS gets out of the car when he comes to pick me up.
10. making someone laugh out loud.
11. finding money in a coat pocket that I had forgotten about.
12. snuggling with my babies.
13. making lists.
14. a good, long stretch.
15. hugs
16. sitting and people watching.
17. approaching a stop light that turns green before I have had to come to a complete stop.
18. turning on the car radio and one of my favorite songs is playing, switching the channel when it's over and it is playing there too.
19. laughing until tears start streaming or I gasp for air.
20. giving people nicknames.
My list is so much longer than this....there are just so many little things that add up to one great big blessed life.

If things happen in 3's, I'm safe, right?

Much to my  chagrin, I have an "anniversary"  of sorts coming up in a few days.  I feel as though I need to begin preparations now, in order to give myself a head start on fate. It began three years ago this coming Friday. It isn't the date itself that is the anniversary, it is simply whatever date the Friday before Spring Break ends up falling on happens to be. It is always an exciting day...the Friday before SB...the anticipation of the coming week off, to relax or travel, or a little bit of both, is quite intoxicating. So on that Friday three years ago, a call to my classroom, only minutes before school was out, came as a total shock and surprise. You see, one of the sweetest human beings on the planet, had accidentally smashed into my almost brand new car. I mean if you think about it, it was raining and to make matters worse, it was Friday the 13th. My car clearly had it coming to it just by being parked in a parking lot. Poor girl, she felt so bad. But it was no big deal, my car spent SB09, in the shop. I got to jet set around in a rental for the week and my little car came back good as new.  I thought that maybe that was a safe way to get the "wreck" out of the way for that car, nobody hurt. Nice. And we rolled right along for a year...no problems. Then came the following Friday before SB. I had to get something signed at the central office for our district, and it needed to be done before we were out the following week. So that afternoon, I drove to Conroe, got the signature required and made my way back south. I was cruising along on the freeway, when suddently I found myself in that slightly scary spot...sandwiched between two 18 wheelers. I was in the middle lane with another truck a bit up ahead of me in my lane. Without warning, something fell off of that truck, and I had nowhere to go in order to avoid it...it demolished the front of my car. It was at that moment, I thought, really? Again? So, in the shop my car went, and in the rental car I went...again. I thought well that is just strange....what are the odds? We'll cut to the chase, because I am positive that all of my friends reading this are smarter than the average bears...let's go to Friday before SB11. The night before I had joked that I was going to ride my bike to school, or if I drove, I would park out on the soccer field away from everyone and that should ensure my cursed car's safety. I bopped down the stairs that morning and as I rounded the far side of the vehicle...the drivers side window, had been broken into. I thought, you have got to be kidding me. I of course took a pic, posted it to facebook, then called the police and my insurance agent. My agent, I would imagine, got there early in anticipation of my yearly call. Turns out, five other cars were broken into as well, and they had caught two guys a couple of streets over. They weren't from around here...and just a little bit slow. I called a friend, was dropped off at school, and by that afternoon, my window was replaced and all was right with the world. Of course, I would still have to be without my car for a bit, to get the window tinted to match the others, no biggie. Later that evening, I went to the grocery store to pick up one item, just one thing. It was about 9:30 pm and the parking lot was virtally empty. When I came out of the store, not ten minutes later, I saw it...a cart was rammed into the side of my door, still attached. It was then, that I lost it. I went back in, demanded that they review the video and find the culprit..I was going  to get my man...or woman!! The video clearly showed the offender. It was...the wind. I started laughing so hard, I am sure that they felf they were in the presence of sheer insanity. At that point, what else can you do? It was funny. Hilarious in fact, but the next morning, perhaps my agent, was not laughing nearly as much as I had. My rental during last year's SB, was awesome. A Charger I think. It went fast, but then again...all my cars do that. I have a heavy foot. I'm hoping my recent weight loss will help with that issue. So...I have just a few days to plan for this year. I have a new car now, I feel that the curse has been lifted. I do, however think that perhaps I will drive my car to an undisclosed location this Thursday night and walk to school Friday morning. I have had a friend to offer a ride, one who said that they would rent me a limo, and in the back of my mind, I thought I might have one who might let all the air out of my tires in the middle of the night...just to keep the streak alive. We shall see. The anticipation is almost too much. My agent has probably called in sick for that day...rightfully so.









i

Yes, my children have four legs each, what's your point?

I have two kids of the feline persuasion. One boy. One girl. They have names, but I just call them boy and girl. They seem to like it. They were born 12 years ago via a surrogate mother. I will always be grateful for her. I could go on and on about how special they are, but I don't want to be one of those braggart parents. Let's just make it short and sweet...they are the best babies in the world and I love them, a lot. I have always had a soft spot for animals. I love them all, regardless of species. I tear up when I see road kill. True story. I cannot view movies with animals in them, even if there is a happy ending. I can't even handle animated characters, especially animated characters. I have only seen part of The Lion King. My wailing caused my removal from the theater. I don't care if Simba isn't real! His daddy died and that is sad. Apparently I also can't handle a person portraying a fictional animated character. My sobbing and shaking seemed to indicate that when I saw Lion King the musical at The Wortham. Why Walt, must baby deer, fish and lion cubs lose their parents? Please don't get me started on Finding Nemo. Some flicks are not even worth an attempt from me. Marley and Me? Nope. War Horse? Surely you jest. Just not gonna happen. I've been known to go to great lengths to help someone find a missing pet. If I see a stray that I'm unable to try and help, I think about it for days. Once a few years ago, I spotted a little pooch wandering around near where I live. It had a collar, but no tags. I scooped her up, took her to a friends house (my children would not have received a guest graciously) fed her, took her picture, and posted it all over the neighborhood. The next morning her elated owners called to claim her. I took their address to return her and discovered that I had basically taken her from in front of their house. In short, I had kidnapped their dog overnight. It was a don't ask, don't tell situation. They didn't ask where I found her, I certainly didn't tell. You will be pleased to know I didn't accept the reward they offered me. But I'm no saint. I will raise my hand and admit to a peccadillo (that's an SAT word). My breath is riddled with the stench of hypocrisy. I eat meat. I love meat. I know...I feel horrible about it, but felt it should be stated. So, if you are ever in the mood for a great steak and want to discuss my love for all creatures over dinner, hit me up.

You're Always 17 In Your Hometown

If you aren't familiar with the title for today's post, it's from a song by Cross Canadian Ragweed. I have found that for me, it seems to hold true. That, of course, means that I am perpetually 17 years old. That seems about right to me, until I swing past a mirror and am smacked in the face with reality. Somehow there are times when I am almost surprised that the person looking back at my reflection isn't sporting a Brian of London-Flock of Seagulls mullet from 1984. I live and work where I spent my growing up years, so I am constantly seeing people and places that are part of my present day life, as well as, some that have been in my life for decades. For some, that fact may seem a bit small minded. I certainly would never describe myself as worldly, or a major traveler.I just like it here, so here I have stayed. Whether it is odd to some, wearing a combination of red and green year round, is completely natural for me. I rather enjoy it. On a daily basis, I drive down the same streets that I did when I first learned to drive. A memory on every corner. I find something  about that comforting. I think many people that I grew up with have found that this area is a great place to live as an adult. I am constantly amazed by the numbers of people who have returned. I guess you can go home again. Tonight I am going to dinner with a friend from high school. We will talk about what is going on in our lives right now, but eventually we will drift into a conversation about how many people may, or may not have, wet their pants while riding in my car during high school, or about singing "Sledgehammer" at the top of our lungs while driving to the Galleria to shop, because their wasn't a mall here...back in the day. I just love that I get to spend time with so many people that have known me and cared for me for years. We have all seen each other go through the good and bad. A few nights ago, I was sharing a meal with a dude from high school that I hang out with and we remarked that it was really neat that although we didn't really "know" each other for a quarter of a century, we can share a memory from when we were 12. You know, like how people  used to hang out at the Wharf, go ice skating, shop at Jamails, and eat pizza at Chubby Bumpkins...when there was a helipad right off of the Parkway before the bridge, how we went to the "Bottom of the Lake" festival before they filled the lake up with water and how we stood on the bottom, looking up to the dragon on a big concrete slab. I also cherish the many friends that I have made here since getting a little "longer in the tooth". As the saying goes, "make new friends, but keep the old...one is silver, the other is gold". The way I see it, each and every one of my friends is cherished and I just consider them all.... platinum.

I'll probably blog every 4 years in honor of Leap Day...yeah right.

So I've decided to try my hand at blogging. If you know me well, you know my days are often times filled with numerous quotes from Seinfeld. So, it seemed appropriate that since I love a show about nothing, that I would author a blog about nothing. Perhaps just a little free writing that may make you laugh, challenge you, or most likely make you sit and just shake your head. I would imagine anyone who might actually take the time to read this, has already grown accustomed to my frequent posts on Facebook. If I have a thought, I most likely will post it. Does that indicate that I crave attention? Probably. I think we all do to some degree, some are just more open to the general public knowing that about them, than are others. I really like knowing what other people are thinking and feeling...that's why I began my Questions of the Night. I think the child/teacher in me loves to play games. That's why I started Where am I? And 20 Questions. I think it's fun. I like to entertain people. That's why I say and write silly things. I like to challenge people and show my weaknesses to them. That's why I share a lot about my faith in God. A dose of Leese isn't for everyone. However, if you want to keep up with my goofiness, and share a slice of my mundane, but oh so blessed life...read on. I'm glad you're here.